There was no where to go. He felt completely trapped, and just fled to the engine room - the furthest point on the ship he could get from Finn in the cockpit. His head was going a million miles a minute and none of it made sense. He shouldn't have told Finn about the Admiral. He shouldn't have--

Then he heard Finn's voice following after him and he clapped his hands over his ears, shutting his eyes tightly.

He just had to - to centre himself again, that was all. Finn was having doubts and it was making him have doubts. He couldn't afford that. He couldn't.

He was slipping into a panic attack, he realised dimly. Like a voice speaking completely detached from him, off deep in his mind. He hadn't had an attack in years, not since his initial training with the Admiral. His breathing was coming fast and hard, his heart speeding along at a million miles a second--

And thus he stood there, in the engine room, hands clasped over his head.

He wasn't waiting.

But he was all too primed.