lina_musebox

;poe

Sex Pollen Pre Relationship
Poe Dies Pre Relationship
Nightmare Early Relationship
Hogwarts AU Pre Relationship
Poe Almost Dies Pre Relationship
MoM AU First Night
Slightly Older Hogwarts AU
Post-TLJ
Bodyguard and Prince AU; overflow
Massage Pre Relationship
Oblivious Poe AU
Cyborg Poe AU
MoM AU Sex Pollen
FO Infiltration Sex Ring
TFLN
Soulmate Tattoo AU
Finn Marries Someone Else AU
Evil Finn AU; overflow: 1, 2
MoM AU Poe 10 Yrs Older
Vamp/Were AU
Missing for a Year/Telepathy AU
MoM AU Poe 'canon' updated
Dark Possessive AU
Married on Yavin AU
MoM AU Sexy Outfits
MoM AU Subway Sex
MoM AU with Melodies!Finn; overflow
MoM AU Photo-Op Kiss
Nearly Old Men AU
MoM AU Rule 63
Online Dating AU
MoM AU Poe Lost His In-Game Memories; overflow
Trans Poe AU
College Roommate AU
TIE Pilot/Prostitute AU
MoM AU Finn Returns from Port-Out
MoM AU Manipulative Masturbation Machine
Canon AU Manipulative Masturbation Machine
Shape Shifter AU; timeskip
FO Sexual Torture AU
MoM AU Finn Has a Boyfriend
Hades AU Finn Left Alone
MoM AU Apocalypse
MoM AU Poe Died in Canon
Canon AU Handjob in a Hospital (inspiration)
MoM AU Another Apocalypse
WWI Pen-Pal/Love Letters AU
Institutionalized Prostitution AU
MoM AU Body Swap
Post-TROS Victory Party

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

It was hard to remember, in the haze of drugs and relief, why they didn’t just do this all the time. Why he didn’t just give in to how much he wanted to touch and hold Finn pretty much all the time when they were together.

Poe melted into the kiss, letting Finn deepen it as much as he wanted, returning it with a lazy passion.

A shudder ran up his spine as he felt the barest brush over his chest.

Oh. No one had really touched him there since—

“Not made of glass,” he murmured against Finn’s lips. “It’d be worth the bacta ...”

Poe certainly seemed like he was made of glass right now. Finn was terrified of hurting him more but also really caught up in the relief that he was here right now.

The doctor had just come in not five minutes before Poe woke up. Surely he could get check up on later. And maybe they'd even have a little time? Wondering just what he was thinking at the image of climbing up there and straddling Poe, he kissed him again.

"What if we had our own celebration?" he asked, kind of ignoring the glass and bacta comment. His hand ghosted over Poe's thigh but stayed there, unsure if he had permission and certainly unsure if the drugs were affecting this decision more than Poe was.

Poe felt a hot flush of arousal between his legs as he groaned quietly, the touch of Finn’s hand on his thigh way more intense than he thought possible.

It also sobered him up very quickly.

“Yeah,” he said a little breathlessly, unconsciously tilting his hips towards Finn’s hand. “But there’s.. Finn, there’s things I haven’t told you...”

Finn's hand moves from his thigh to his waist, not enough to put on a full stop but more than enough to show his interest in Poe has to say. He's not worried, exactly. In fact, his heart hammers with all the things they hadn't said.

"What is it?" he asks breathlessly, still gazing at Poe softly and trying to keep himself from kissing him again for just a moment.

Poe wet his lips, still in a nice hazy space and yet a tendril of nervousness curled up his spine.

It wasn't that he hadn't meant to tell Finn eventually. He just... kept pushing it off. After the war, he told himself eventually. He was already trying to come up with reasons to put this off. But he felt so floaty and calm that it was hard to feel super anxious about it.

"You're, uh... You're not going to find what you expect, down there," he murmured. "I wasn't - I just wasn't born this way, let's put it that way."

Not what he expected down there. Not born this way.

Finn blinked at Poe before gently dabbing the back of his hand against his forehead. "They really got you on the good stuff," he mumbled, not finding a fever. "What do you mean, wasn't born this way? What do you feel like? Are you okay?"

Poe couldn't help it, a low chuckle blooming in his throat, helpless and fond.

"I'm fine - Finn, I'm fine. I just, ah..." He trailed off, a little helplessly. He'd never actually really had to do this before. It was kind of unspoken common knowledge when he was in the Fleet, and because of that, most of Black Squadron had known, too. It just... wasn't a thing that anyone really felt needed to be discussed, at this point.

Poe was Poe. What else was there to it?

He wet his lips, reaching up to touch Finn's jaw softly.

"Look, I just know that some people have some pretty specific preferences when it comes to, uh, their partners." Which was definitely the closest Poe had ever come to acknowledging Finn as his partner, before. Thanks, painkillers. "So I get it, if it's not what you expect. But uh - damn. Should I just show you?" He mumbled it half to himself. "Maybe I should just show you."

Partners. Did Poe just call them partners in a roundabout way? Did he mean it like that? "Your my preference," he said with a hell of a lot of conviction and love.

Then he realized that Poe was talking about his body. He meant sexually. Had he been injured badly before, like Finn and his back? His hand moved again from Poe's waist to his hand. "Hey, whatever you think's wrong, it's okay. You know that, right? I'm here for you. I don't care about the rest."

Okay, honestly, Finn was pretty sure that Poe was all worried over something minor or something he should know that Finn wouldn't care about, but the drugs were making him anxious. That was all right, though. Finn planned to drift through it and, if he was really lucky, hold Poe close by the end of the night while they listened to the party beyond these walls.

Poe's heart felt near enough to burst, and he squeezed Finn's hand back incredibly warmly.

"Yeah, alright," He murmured. "It's not like I don't have a prosthetic, but - don't bother wearing it in my flight suit, since it messes all the life support systems up, you know?" No, Finn could not have any idea that Poe was talking about how frustrating it was to pee in a flight suit when you had a prosthetic penis attachment. "So I can still - later, it'll be fine, I can do whatever you want. Just, uh..."

Just show him, Poe.

He squeezed the man's hand again and then pulled it closer, pressing it against the heat between his legs where there was quite clearly nothing firm beneath it.

Finn was actually kind of worried about touching him at this point. For one, Poe seemed extremely high and wasn't making any sense, so the line about consent felt a bit blurred right now. Or two, Poe wasn't high at all and was trying to tell Finn that he'd sustained some sort of injury or something happened to change how he looked beneath his clothes.

Caught with indecision, he allowed Poe to guide his hand wherever he wanted and- Oh.

For a brief second, he'd thought that this was a very grievous injury before realizing... that wasn't the case. He'd heard about this actually, about technology that could change someone's entire physical gender to something totally different, about people who didn't feel comfortable in their own skin. He could kind of relate to that last part, but he'd never seen someone after transitioning. Now he realizes that he's probably seen loads and never noticed, realizes how incredible that field of medicine really was.

He rubbed his hand just an inch back and forth to make sure before letting out a haggard breath. "Poe, I thought you were trying to tell me you thought you were some other species for a minute, then I thought you were saying everything got cut off in some freak accident- It has been a long 48 hours." He bent forward, laughing in relief and kissing Poe's nose then his lips. "Don't scare me like that. Are you sure you feel okay?"

Edited 2019-07-26 01:10 (UTC)

There was one slight hiccup to Poe's plan of making the man who he hadn't even technically made his boyfriend yet touch him there. And that was he hadn't quite realised just how electrifying it was to be touched there, since - well, no one else had done it in a long time. He groaned, softy, under his breath when Finn moved that scarce inch, and twitched enough to make his side ping with pain. Not enough to make him make a sound, but enough for him to notice beyond the painkillers.

Relief washed through him as Finn spoke, and he sank down into the sheet contentedly.

"Yeah. Feel a lot better now," He murmured, tilting his head up to meet those perfect lips.

His hand moved further up, resting on Poe's lower stomach instead while he returned the kiss. "You've been worried about this a while?"

That was only sort of a question, but it explained a lot of things. Why they hadn't gone any further than the few kisses they shared, why they hadn't become official in any way. There were other reasons, Finn was sure. War takes people away without warning.

But it was over now. "Partners," he breathed quietly against Poe's lips, loving the sound of it but wondering if it was true.

"Just never seemed a good time to bring it up," he murmured, easily melting into that kiss.

"War's over now, though," He pointed out in a low murmur. "So yeah. Partners." There was a pause, and then a smile tugged at his lips, likely more felt than seen.

"... Husbands, if you want."

... Husbands.

Finn leaned away to look at him, trying to see if he was serious or not. Just a second ago, he wasn't even certain this was a committed thing and now Poe was proposing.

"How about-... How about you ask again when I'm sure you're not just high on painkillers," he said carefully. "But if you do, I have a feeling the answer would be... yes..."

But what if Poe was being overly affected by the drugs in his system? What if he didn't mean it and Finn's answer would freak him out later? What if this was what pulled them apart? Only, he couldn't say no. He couldn't tell Poe no.

Poe smiled, wide and warm and the happiest Finn had likely ever seen him.

"I'll propose properly later," he agreed, not put out in the slightest. He was, in fact, very high on painkillers, and while he was kind of enjoying that, he was also aware that his tongue was running a little away with him.

"You can kiss me again if you want, though." Look, he'd do it himself if he could somehow not be horizontal.

Finn cupped either side of Poe's jaw and kissed him deeply without needing to be told twice. From that look on his face, he was fairly certain that this wouldn't break them apart, even if Poe didn't mean to ask.

"Does, uh-... Does that mean I can tell you that I love you?" But he quickly kissed him again to stop either of them from saying more immediately.

Poe was about to reply when he was cut off with a kiss, but really couldn't care to mind. He mumbled into it, something like 'mmhmm', before reaching up and curling fingers into Finn's lapels and dragging him down a bit.

He shuffled over, clearly intending to get Finn onto the hospital bed with him.

When the kiss finally broke he murmured: "I mean, I already know, but you can tell me anyway."

Finn took a deep breath and swallowed, trying to pack down on his nerves. Why he was nervous when Poe seemed perfectly in agreeance with everything right now, he couldn't say. He just... really wanted this to be real, to last.

But he could let go of that fear and enjoy this for one night, pretend that it was all real and they were finally getting that happy life. Wouldn't be the first time he pretended such a thing.

He carefully climbed into the bed, gently resting his arm around Poe's waist. "I love you," he whispered entirely too seriously.

Poe had never felt so good in his life, and that was probably only about fifty percent the painkillers. He took a deep breath as Finn crawled in beside him, shuffling closer and pressing his face into the mans neck as he slipped an arm around his waist.

"Yeah, I know." He said again, far too pleased with himself.

He pressed a kiss to the hollow of Finn's throat, and said - as easy as if he was giving the weather - "I love you, too."

Finn held him close. Not tight, though. He was hesitant to hold him firmly, but he was still pressed against Poe as much as a person could be.

"Let's celebrate later," he muttered in a promise to Poe's hair, his heart full to bursting with this newfound happiness that he was sure couldn't be real. Tears sprouted in his eyes, but he kept his breathing steady and just let them be, relaxing into- into his fiancé.

Poe just smiled, letting his eyes close as he pressed another kiss to Finn's throat. He hadn't quiet realised how exhausted he felt, until that second. But that was fine.

"Deal," he murmured, far too content already.

"If I fall asleep on you will you blame me?"

"No," he answered, rubbing a hand over Poe's back mostly for comfort, partly feeling for bandages. "I think I'll feel pretty honored, actually."

The doctors, on the other hand, will probably have something to say about it. Finn was completely willing to take the hit on that one.

There were plenty of bandages to feel, and Poe let out a small sigh before sinking more heavily against Finn.

"Good, 'cause I feel like I could sleep for a week," He murmured, unable to open his eyes again.

He went quiet. Quiet enough that one might assume sleep had over taken him. And then, just as it seemed there was no chance he was awake, he added:

"But we are going to celebrate. Thoroughly. Later."

Finn laughed, the joy and shock radiating through him, but he tried to control himself. Didn't want to be too loud or jostle Poe around.

So after biting his lip and rubbing at his eyes, he replied. "Thoroughly. Definitely. I promise."

Finn's laugh, especially when he was obviously trying hard to subdue it, was the best sound in the galaxy, and Poe grinned to himself as he buried his face in the man's throat.

"Good. Gonna hold you to that," he murmured.

And then seconds later, he was asleep.

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